Honestly

I have a long, long list of things to be thankful for. I really do. Somehow, in a world of billions of people, I ended up exactly here, with all the blessings that I have, and if that doesn't make someone believe in a higher power, well, I don't know what would. Material things. People. Wisdom ... So many blessings. Today I want to focus on honesty, the double edged sword that it is, because without it (and the wisdom to recognize it) we would all be floundering in the lies we create and perpetuate, pretending to not know the difference.

Honesty hurts. It does.

Honesty is telling someone when they've hurt you, or when you've hurt them, even though the telling of it might kill you.

Honesty is looking at yourself and the gaping holes that exist in your heart and knowing to do something about them, even though changing is a painful process.

Honesty is realizing that some people aren't meant to stay in your life forever, and that the past sometimes ought to remain there, even though you miss them with every breath.

Honesty is seeing the heart in a person, even when their actions speak otherwise.

Honesty is letting others see you for you, without pretentions, even though their view of you may be tarnished.

Honesty is asking for help when you need it, even when you really, really don't want to. Even though you still think it is a weakness. Even though you suck at it. And it's letting yourself be helped.

Honesty is the look in the eyes of someone you love when you first see them in the morning, before they put their walls up and the world tells them how to act. Even when your makeup is smeared and your hair a tangled mess, they still think the sun shines out your ass (forgive the vulgarity) and are happy to see you.

Honestly, this past weekend has made me realize all of these things, with more clarity than I have before. I finally feel like I can let go of some skeletons in the closet; move on to bigger and better things. And that, honestly, is the best blessing I could have asked for.